by Katherine Kopp
Humorist Robert Benchley once said, “In America, there are two classes of travel—first class and with children.” Almost 100 years after Benchley’s statement, it’s clear that today, travel with kids—including multigenerational travel—can be a first-class experience in a variety of settings.
In the 2023 Family Travel Association’s (FTA) annual family travel survey of 3,300 parents and grandparents, more than half of parents surveyed said they are planning travel with grandparents and children. Fifty-four percent of grandparents surveyed said they plan and organize multigenerational travel, and 50% have taken multigenerational trips in the past three years.
Such trips can range from cruises to luxury resorts in the United States, or international excursions to more casual vacations close to home, such as travel to the North Carolina mountains or beaches. What all these types of trips have in common is a desire among the participants to bring families closer together.
“The big plus for our family is the intergenerational bonding that takes place,” says Alice Parker*, who lives in Pittsboro. “When you are on vacation with your family— grandparents, parents and kids—and you get people away from their phones, their routines, their familiar home and work and school settings. It’s a wonderful way for everyone to experience greater closeness.”
A WORLD OF OPTIONS
Crystal Burriss, owner of DWB Vacations in Raleigh, says that many families she assists with planning travel over holidays often seek ways to simplify traditional holiday gatherings. “Some families are planning to travel to a destination with appeal for everyone, instead of getting together at one person’s house,” she explains. “Taking a trip allows families to avoid the drama over ‘Whose turn is it to host Thanksgiving this year?’ Families are spread out all across the country, and planning a trip can be an easy way for the whole family to come together.”
In Burriss’ view, cruises are one of the easiest ways for a multigenerational group to travel together. “Years ago, those of us in the travel business used to say that cruises were for ‘the newly wed and the nearly dead,’” she says with a laugh. “But today, the newer ships offer something for everyone: zip lines and rock wall climbing for the kids, as well as yoga classes, nice dinners and dancing, and other activities for parents and grandparents.”
Cruises also offer the opportunity for adults traveling with children or grandchildren to try new things. “I have had grandparents tell me they got out of their comfort zone on the ship and played laser tag with their grandchildren,” Burriss says. “That’s probably not something they would do at home.”
Cruises and all-inclusive resorts are popular with families planning multigenerational travel, since they can eliminate the need for multiple people to make a common decision. “There can be something for everyone,” says Burriss. “All-inclusive resorts and cruises offer many different activities and many different dining options, so families can choose to do some things together as well as spend some time apart.”
Betsy Cantrell, a grandparent from Chapel Hill, has traveled with her husband, their daughter and her family for many years. “When the kids were little, our daughter and her husband liked for us to babysit,” she recalls. “It took some of the burden off them. They had more time with each other and we got to enjoy spending time with our grandchildren. Now that the kids are older and branching out to do more adventurous things, we often do more as a group.”
“We have gone to Disney World together a number of times,” she says. “We have also gone to the Cayman Islands, which has become an annual trip. We stay in separate condos and cook and eat some meals together. What works well for our family group is to do some activities together but not all.”
Dominique Harkness of Durham has traveled frequently with her two children, ages 3 and 10, her mother and her brother. Last year, the family enjoyed a trip to New Orleans. Often thought of as an adult destination, Harkness says her kids “loved New Orleans!”
Their favorite activity was a steamboat tour on the Mississippi River. “We had lunch on the boat and there was a jazz band playing,” she says. “It was an amazing experience for all generations.”
Other favorite activities for her family included checking out Canal Street’s shops, walking around the Garden District and exploring some of New Orleans’ famed cuisine—mostly for breakfast and lunch, which are more affordable.
Harkness and her family tend to book stays with one chain of hotels, accumulating points that can result in upgrades or other benefits. “We always book a suite or adjoining rooms that include a microwave and a mini refrigerator,” she says. “That helps us keep our food costs down.”
NAVIGATING CHALLENGES
While the benefits of multigenerational travel can include greater family bonding and practical benefits such as sharing costs, the experience can also present challenges.
“The cons can be that there may be different ‘speeds’ of travel for everyone,” says Parker, “and different interests that must be considered. Compromise is key.”
What has worked well for her family is “setting expectations ahead of time” and factoring in some time apart in the planning process.
“I’m a big believer in planning ahead and communicating as much as possible before the trip,” she says. “For example, if our family was contemplating travel to Disney World with my parents, I would say ahead of time, ‘We will be up by 8 a.m., have breakfast by 8:30, and go on to the park after that. Why don’t you plan to meet us there at 11 after you’ve had time to sleep in and have a leisurely breakfast?’
“If we are traveling with my parents and perhaps one of my sibling’s families too, we usually plan a half- day or day apart, then we come together later to share experiences.”
Parker also suggests giving older kids a role in the travel planning. “Everyone should get to choose one thing they really want to do at their travel destination, so everyone has buy-in on the trip,” she says. “And most importantly, once you’ve reached your destination, you’ve got to have grace and a sense of humor when traveling with grandparents, parents and kids. That will help assure that your trip is a success.”
Alice Parker* (name changed for privacy reasons)